May 1 is the beginning of my faith party. It's a party in some abyss where I commune with darkness and perhaps with a pinch of light. I can only do one thing there and that is waiting.
I was given options earning a bit this summer so heads are kept above water. But not even that was part of my agenda, hoping that is what God asks from someone like me doing the faith journey. The odds are countless and, to my estimate, are pretty rough. But some who had waited in the past have been rewarded. I had done some of the most gruesome waitings as well. And through all those, God kept his word.
I don't want any reward for reward's sake. I just need his hand guiding me and my family to where things are in accordance to his will, a place where we are fed by the greatness of his faithfulness.
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