I don't remember how things worked out well for me as a tiny tot long time ago. Things were simpler then. I still see vivid images of Lolo Matthew and Lola Saring more than I remember how my Mama was like in those tender years. I guess I know why. And right now, I understand the circumstance she was in. In some of her bitter moments then, I felt unwanted as a baby. How can I dump all the blame to her weary chest, when everything that made her whole had seemed to made her world crumble to nothingness. I couldn't grasp the complex world that got me in the middle of a crossfire. But I grew up and at 9 long before I knew the hand that actually rocked my crib, I found refuge in a small, almost dilapidated church, nearby. The crossfire was bearable finally.
My Mama grew up in Sunday School classes way back in Mindanao days. I knew the Lord came with her all the way to Cebu when she fled like a scared young girl. She had me when her world was about to rise to its peak. She fled from it all. She had me. She almost wanted me off her belly. But she had me. The Lord rocked my cradle there. Best of all, He rocked my weeping mother to this day. And gave her a better life.
So how can I, in these difficult times we are in, ever doubt how things would work out in this scary world? The heart gets scared no doubt, but I hold on to the hand that rocks our cradle.
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