An elderly woman at church told me when I was little, "Be kind at all times." I never thought the phrase "at all times" would take on varied meanings as I grew up.
Fast forward, I found that the world could be mean even to the most unsuspecting, well-meaning people. At a workplace, I succumbed to a lot of unbelievable maneuverings which raised issues about my person as an employee. That church woman's admonition had seemed to be the most unlikely. It was the most difficult time to be kind. How can I be kind when there is so much hate around? And then another woman told me the space I occupied in that place was mine and none of those that said otherwise could reverse that. Those were the kindest words I have heard in a long while. I was stunned at how someone could still take me in despite the noise that tried to ruin my career for years. I have held on to those kind words since then. That woman's kindness was like an embrace I needed. In fact, she was hope personified when I needed a reason to persist. I went fairly well after many years. I guess those words were enough for me to last that long. That world I was in was still mean but I subsisted. That woman at the work place did not just tell me to be kind. She was kindness herself.
Recently, as the pandemic continues to wear on, I begin to see kindness at a vantage.
In the last quarter of 2021, Cebu saw potentials in the economy when the IATF placed Cebu at a more relaxed COVID-19 protocol level while the other places like those in Luzon were still on stricter pandemic protocol. It was but the perfect time for Cebu to get back economically. Then came Odette's manic onslaught in the middle of the Christmas rush. Cebu and some portions of Mindanao woke up the next morning to the horror of the typhoon's devastation.
Admittedly, I was not actually scared or anxious despite the fixing that our ceiling needed and countless electricity posts and trees being down. I guess I had it in my thinking that much like other disasters in other places, help and assistance were prompt. We knew that. We remember because we were there. We were there to share what kindness could afford us.
People went about fixing what remained to be salvageable. But none was hopeless. Many waited in silence. That faith in brotherhood and kindness was palpable in that silence. But that morning, the waiting took hours, then hours became a day, then a few more, then a week. Then news of the power company clearing roads in other cities came as a burst of hope. But when I turned, I still see power supply posts still lying there in our subdivision. Waiting.
Water was still scarce. Long queues for water, ATM terminals, solar panels, and power banks were now the norm. It is now the 11th day. Portions of Cebu were now lighted but that is just mere scattered portions of Cebu and who knows Leyte and Mindanao could even be worse. As for us, we were at the mercy of churches and department stores offering free charging of portable lights and gadgets just to get updates regarding help. But the assistance Cebu is in dire need of was slow or seemingly not coming at all. Now where was kindness when it was needed? There were a few fund drives thankfully. But the dismal state Cebu was in called for more than a few fund drives.
Sometimes, it may not be the goods or the money. Sometimes just being around and extending a visible hand is more than enough to know that not only few but everyone does care.
But then despite the obvious need of kindness, one can only hope for it to come. It is tragic to wait. It is even more tragic when after all the waiting, no help came. And then the unthinkable but probable happens--power wires of posts are gradually stolen by the same people whose cries for help may have fallen on dull deaf ears.
As much as there are a plethora of reasons why kindness is hard to come by, after Odette, I learned that there are instances that makes kindness easy. It is easy to be kind when:
1. you are happy,
2. you have plenty to share,
3. you have less to sacrifice,
4. you have an affinity or certain regard to the one in need of kindness and
5. when you know you can get something back in return.
Obviously, in the middle of the pandemic, people are rarely happy. So kindness cannot be expected. Second, only very few have plenty but maybe, just maybe, not for sharing, hence, kindness is not option. Third, with the economy down, there is too much to sacrifice if kindness means extending material help, which is not always the case ideally. Fourth, Cebu may not have a special relationship with some of its competitors across the country economically and perhaps politically as well. In this regard, any act of kindness is dependent on how friendly or how strong we are in relation to the country's economy. Fifth, extending any form of help can be politically motivated. It may be egocentric. Any help extended should bring back double the expended kindness. The layman's term aptly puts it, "Tabangan tika basta tabangi nya ko." Sounds fair enough but this is not kindness. This is negotiation. This is business if not politics talking. Borrowing from what that old woman in the church said, kindness is an attitude meant for all times--not only when it is convenient.
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